tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14507598423521373042024-03-05T11:11:43.603-08:00The Toothless GrinAn honest expression of the joys and challenges of motherhood.Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.comBlogger78125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-27828025360307166862010-06-18T18:55:00.000-07:002010-06-18T18:58:13.840-07:00FriendshipI haven't written in ages, but if you haven't updated your links to my blog, it can now be found at <a href="http://thetoothlessgrin.wordpress.com/2010/06/17/238/">http://thetoothlessgrin.wordpress.com</a>. I wrote on Friendship and Community last night. Something I am trying to encourage in my life. Come join me! You're my community too!Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-90340229770778685002010-03-24T11:23:00.001-07:002010-03-24T11:24:43.137-07:00The Toothless Grin Has Moved!Keep following us at <a href="www.thetoothlessgrin.wordpress.com">www.thetoothlessgrin.wordpress.com</a>!!Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-83794034239040167282010-03-08T18:09:00.000-08:002010-03-08T18:12:28.697-08:00Um… I think I think I can<p class="MsoNormal">You all remember the little train that could, right? I’m not sure where the story began, but I remember that clip from dumbo…</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zt6F7YJYowM&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zt6F7YJYowM&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object> <p class="MsoNormal">I’m not sure if I should say I feel like that train or what, but I feel like I’m about to attempt something I’m not sure I can do.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Last week I got a Facebook invitation to run the Bolder Boulder (a 10K) with my friend Erin. I don’t know why, maybe Erin made it sound like a lot of fun or I put on my rose colored glasses, but I started to think <i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal">That is a really good idea. I should do that!</i> On Saturday I ran a mile for the first time in probably ten years and felt <i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal">awesome</i>. Like I could conquer the world.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Today I ran 1.5 miles. Let’s just say it was a very different experience. When the treadmill said 0.75 miles I found myself praying to God. “Oh God, I can’t do this. Please help me do this. I can’t do this.” A much different running dialogue from that cute little train.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Here’s my question to you. Has anyone ever gone from “Couch to 10K?” Cause that’s what I’m essentially trying to do. Did it ever feel better? Did the training make you feel good? Because ever since .75 miles, I have felt like I need to have a really good cry. I didn’t expect such an emotional response to pushing myself so hard physically! I now understand why The Biggest Loser contestants always break down.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I just need some encouragement.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I remember that the end of this clip was inspiring to me as a kid. It brought me so much joy to <span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>see that little engine so happy! I hope that when May 31<sup>st</sup> comes around I will be running into that stadium feeling exalted and saying to myself “I thought I could! I thought I could! I thought I could!”</p>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-41086921814019572642010-03-07T14:00:00.000-08:002010-03-07T13:03:17.797-08:00Oh yeah, this is what it is to be a mom...<div>I just found this post that I wrote on my birthday (February 16th) and apparently never published. Well, I want to share it now. It looks like I never quite finished it which is probably why I never published it. Oh well!</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>It's my birthday today. This year's birthday feels so much different from previous birthdays. Last year was my first birthday with Jack. My sister-friend Krysta sent me a card telling me to let Jack and Tim care for me that day. While I appreciated the sentiment, the reality was that Jack was still completely dependent on me for nourishment so I couldn't exactly "get away" or not take care of him. And I'm pretty sure Tim had to work.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>That was a hard time.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>I was hopeful that this year would be more special, more selfishly devoted to me. But last night when I went to care for Jack who had a fever of 101.8 and was screaming out of pain or.... something (it's still a guessing game, you know?), I thought, yup. Just another day. With only 5 hours of sleep. Yawn.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>But really, when is it <i>just</i> another day? I feel when I start getting this attitude I begin to feel entitled to so much more than I am. I want to be thankful for each day and everything it brings. This is so much easier said than done, but I don't think it's at all off-base.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>So here's what I'm thankful for and what I love on my 28th birthday.</div><div><br /></div><div><ul><li>My wonderful husband who arranged for a babysitter and is taking me out to play games at an arcade tonight because I want to. (I know, I'm a dork - but I'm so sick of the usual dinner and a movie...)</li><li>My adorable son Jack whose smiles, cuddles and laughter warm my heart. He's wonderful.</li><li>My parents who I can call at any time (like my dad at 12:30am his time last night) and who support everything I do.</li><li>My sisters who have all wished me a happy birthday birthday (I love you guys!).</li><li>I now have a job I love with coworkers I respect who sang "Happy Birthday" to me this morning. (I <i>am</i> special today!)</li><li>The fact that I don't have to worry about food and can go to sleep tonight under a down comforter.</li><li>The free cold-stone "like-it" creation I ate last night and the Caribou coffee mocha I drank this morning that were FREE because it's my birthday! (sign up on their websites to receive emails... for all the junk mail throughout the year, this is definitely worth it) - oh, the other stuff I got for free was awesome too (DQ, Noodles, Qdoba...)</li></ul></div><div><br /></div>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-59304396698277827342010-03-07T12:45:00.000-08:002010-03-08T21:15:52.438-08:00Having it all Together - what does that even MEAN anyways?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEJlgKJmzpLgA9M7jEDtv_bctr_Hk6bolreWLcHyRXUr7J1-pTh3LYHFQnYvQWvlV9zZ91inGB4-1IGSAme5AGR224jiN00kWLZ6lNH5nhqqR0PZAPsuLj9qBhTJN326008qiCcA2S5OH4/s1600-h/getting+it+all+done.gif"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 127px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEJlgKJmzpLgA9M7jEDtv_bctr_Hk6bolreWLcHyRXUr7J1-pTh3LYHFQnYvQWvlV9zZ91inGB4-1IGSAme5AGR224jiN00kWLZ6lNH5nhqqR0PZAPsuLj9qBhTJN326008qiCcA2S5OH4/s400/getting+it+all+done.gif" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5445996038222751874" /></a><p class="MsoNormal">I was mall-walking with a friend of mine who is navigating the choppy waters of working mom/partially working at home mom and she said to me “I feel like I’m failing at everything. I’m failing as a mother, as a wife and as a kung-fu instructor<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Calibri, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: 800; font-size: medium;">." [<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, serif; font-weight: normal; font-size: 16px; ">Job title changed to help my friend remain anonymous. ;)]</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I look around my apartment right now and holy cow, if you’re judging me as anything based on the state of our home, yes I am failing. There are dishes piled in the sink, shoes scattered around the front door, toys in the strangest places, crochet projects half finished draped over my chair… and on and on. <span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Oh! And on top of all of that mess, there are Subway wrappers and a Little Caesars box in the trash – actually, the box is still on top of the stove, but you get the idea. I have not been cooking homemade meals much this last week because I can’t figure out when to get to the grocery store or <i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal">what</i> to make for dinner in the first place. It’s as though that part of my brain has been replaced by other things that need to get done.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And the thing is, I don’t care. I’ve given up on keeping everything tidy and I know that when I get into the swing of things I will be back to making meals again. I recently read somewhere (can’t remember where at the moment) that we need to stop apologizing for our messy homes because 1) it gives off the perception that we have everything in perfect order other times and 2) it makes others feel that their homes shouldn’t be messy either.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I also think that if I try to compare what I was able to do before Jack was born with what I am able to do <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">now</i>, I will feel miserable. Life has changed. I have experienced a huge transition and with that I have been able to see what is really important. My relationship with Jack is more important than the fact that the dishes need to be done. So I get on the floor and roll around with him. The dishes can wait. My relationship with Tim is more important than the laundry. So I get on the floor… never mind. ;)</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">What I’m trying to say is that our standards need to change. What we might see as mediocre is actually huge success. And we need to encourage one another to feel that way too.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">So, for all of you moms who feel like you should’ve done more, know this: I am proud of you. You have done exactly what it is you are able to do and that is exactly enough.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Oh, and <a href="http://thetoothlessgrin.blogspot.com/2009/10/shoulds.html">you shouldn’t should on yourself</a>. ;)</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Love you all!</p><div style="mso-element:footnote-list"><div style="mso-element:footnote" id="ftn1"> </div></div>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-68512556883965433722010-03-04T18:30:00.001-08:002010-03-04T18:31:38.128-08:00Jesus was NOT a mom.<p class="MsoNormal"></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">You know, it has once again been “one of those days.” It started out well. I was in a groove, getting work done, feeling good, when Tim and Jack came home. Immediately life was disrupted and it hasn’t really calmed down. Oh sure, we weren’t <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">busy</i> all day, but I never got back to work. And I felt like Jack and I were bored. I would have left if I could, but you can’t exactly leave a 15 month old child at home alone (he’s fifteen months today! Isn’t that crazy?). We did go to the park, but that’s only stimulating for Jack, if you know what I mean.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">I tried to feed Jack dinner, but he kept throwing everything on the floor. Already feeling worn out and testy, I pulled him from his seat, put him in the hallway for a “time out” and firmly said “NO throwing things on the floor. NO.”<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">I came back to him a minute later and, though he wasn’t upset, he said “No. No. No!” Copying me of course. I gave him a bath after he peed on himself and I have finally been able to put him to bed. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">Now it’s my alone time, but I still have work to do.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">One of my favorite passages in the Bible says, <span class="apple-style-span"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin.</i></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal"> </i></span><span class="apple-style-span"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal">Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. </i>(Hebrews 4:15-16) In other words, Jesus has gone through all of the crap we go through and understands what we go through every day. Therefore, he will help us as we struggle through each day.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">As I was rocking Jack to sleep I thought, but Jesus, you were never a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal">Mom</i>. You were never a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal">working mom</i>. How the heck do you know what I’m dealing with?<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">And then I started remembering this story when Jesus had been healing people all day. The next morning, he went away, up a mountain to spend some time alone with God. And the disciples followed him. They said, “Jesus, there are more people for you to heal.” And I’m sure, inside he was screaming (without sin of course), “Leave me alone, leave me alone, leave me alone!!!”<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">He had so many people coming after him all of the time, demanding everything from him. Yes, he was God, but he was also human and that kind of ministry must have been exhausting.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">And in a way, he did say to the people, “leave me alone.” He told the disciples, “Let us go somewhere else – to the nearby villages – so I can preach there also. That is why I have come.” (Mark 1:38) He did not just do whatever everyone told him to do. He knew his purpose and did it.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">So often moms and wives and women in general are “yes-women.” We’re taught to be that way. But if we follow Jesus’ example, we take time with the Father and do what He wants us to do.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">I wonder what that would have looked like for me today. Maybe it wouldn’t have been trying to accommodate Jack’s every whim, but instead would have been preparing my lesson for Sunday while keeping him on my radar. If I had done that, I wouldn’t be dreading an evening of study right now and I’d have some alone time.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p> </o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:12.0pt">So, what should I do now? Probably take that alone time. With God. And rest in the fact that Jesus knows what it’s like to have other people/things demanding my attention. Yes, I’ll do that. And try again tomorrow.</span></span><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p></p>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-82238228851469150432010-03-03T20:16:00.000-08:002010-03-03T20:23:41.633-08:00reluctant update with a fun ending (at least I think so)<div>Sigh.</div><div><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p>Once again it has been a long time since I have written. Whenever more than a week goes by, I feel like I need to write this huge update and I don’t like writing updates. They’re so boring to me. Not creative enough. But I want to catch you up on me and explain why I haven’t written, so here you go. ;)</o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal">Things have been so crazy for me. I am settling in to my new job at Scum of the Earth Church. I received my license on Sunday (woohoo!) and am now officially a pastor. And guess what. I love my job. Love it.</p><p class="MsoNormal">I get to teach. And study. And talk to people about God and stuff. It’s so cool! It’s exactly what I hoped for. Plus, it’s really flexible with Jack because I can do a lot of work from home.</p><p class="MsoNormal">But that’s also the problem. I do a lot of work at home.</p><p class="MsoNormal">I can’t seem to figure out how to balance everything! It didn’t help that Jack was sick for nearly two weeks. Oh, and then Tim got sick. And I wasn’t feeling right. But beyond that interruption, it is still tough to say, “I’ll work during his nap.” Because naptime comes and I am hungry or need to shower so I do those things and have thirty minutes before Jack gets up. When he was sick I did all of my work in the evening that week. THAT was exhausting.</p><p class="MsoNormal">But, here I am. I was able to work for four hours today at Solid Grounds and I hope to continue having Wednesdays for that. Once Tim starts working full time again I hope to find childcare at least one day a week. That would be a nice rhythm.</p><p class="MsoNormal">Here’s an update on Jack. Ready?</p><p class="MsoNormal">He’s crawling!!</p></div><div><p class="MsoNormal">I feel like we have a pet, because he comes up behind us so that we nearly step on him. And he gets into things he couldn’t before, tearing up papers and making a HUGE mess. It’s pretty cute. The other day he was in our bedroom with me and Tim. I went to the kitchen and a moment later I could hear <i>grunt pant pant grunt</i> It was Jack coming after me. So so <i>so</i> cute! He looks even smaller when he crawls all balled up. I love it.</p><p class="MsoNormal">We are finding so many things that need to be childproofed. I’ve given up on the DVD/VCR/HD box. He could push those buttons all day long. It keeps him occupied, so I let him. :)</p><p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAhlhhyphenhyphenxAv2udvlAG3BweRIE5ebq_HghPYe2v90THTtlKSl9TGj-vmfA1KVp_Y9IN_tEYKg7NNfO9vFgpVL3BEMv1UPNc_PKJsv-oSrq0-umpWDNFkQs-LaM1rVfMSs0-ZJdX7lor4_3Z1/s1600-h/IMG_1451.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAhlhhyphenhyphenxAv2udvlAG3BweRIE5ebq_HghPYe2v90THTtlKSl9TGj-vmfA1KVp_Y9IN_tEYKg7NNfO9vFgpVL3BEMv1UPNc_PKJsv-oSrq0-umpWDNFkQs-LaM1rVfMSs0-ZJdX7lor4_3Z1/s400/IMG_1451.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5444628320654889346" /></a><p class="MsoNormal">Well, that’s all for tonight. I hope to soon be settled and back to my normal self. Sweet dreams!</p>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-28450880837182925962010-02-08T18:39:00.000-08:002010-02-08T18:49:35.242-08:00back off people!Can I vent? Ok, I will...<br /><br />I am so tired of people asking me if Jack is walking. I am also tired of people asking me if Jack is crawling. I am even more tired of people telling me, "it's ok, he will."<br /><br />Yeah, I know.<br /><br />The fact that Jack isn't very mobile doesn't usually bother me. He's not getting into things. He's content. We're all happy.<br /><br />My sister didn't walk until she was 18 months. I didn't walk until I was 15 months. My dad didn't talk until he was 3 years! We are all a little slow in my family and we are all geniuses.<br /><br />;)<br /><br />I know everyone is trying to rejoice in Jack when they ask these questions. They want to be happy for him growing up. And when he doesn't meet their expectations, they try to encourage <span style="font-style: italic;">me</span> that he's ok. I know he's ok. He's so smart! He signs "please, more, bye-bye, light, all done" and sometimes "puppy." He answers yes and no questions - well, at least when the answer is "yes." His favorite word is "Woah!" and he's the cutest kid in the world!<br /><br />I am just beginning to see how some moms (and dads) get their sense of self-worth from their children. I have never felt that way until Jack didn't crawl when expected and everyone started looking at me with pity. And now I feel responsible for making him crawl as though it's <span style="font-style: italic;">my</span> fault that he's not. I can see how that might lead to me feeling like I'm responsible for him getting good grades or excelling in sports or music or whatever.<br /><br />I do not want to be that mom.<br /><br />I am not going to <span style="font-style: italic;">be</span> that mom.<br /><br />So, in case you're wondering, no, Jack is not walking. And, no, he is not crawling.<br /><br />And I am proud of him.Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-45146222874272619262010-02-04T22:41:00.001-08:002010-02-04T22:50:46.588-08:00Self-Knowledge & Self-Care<span style=";font-family:arial;font-size:100%;" >Do you ever feel like you’re still figuring yourself out? I am always surprised when I have to relearn fast facts about me. For example, I’m an introvert. I love people. I love being with people and talking to people, but people also wear me out.
<br />
<br /></span> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Today I hosted the mom’s group from my church. It was great to have everyone over – even though Jack was obsessively clingy, but that’s a different issue altogether. I enjoyed spending time with the other moms. When they left I thought I would put Jack down for his nap, eat a quick lunch, and get right to work.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">But I was drained.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:arial;font-size:100%;" >I needed time to decompress. I needed to do something that would help me relax before I could get to work, so I looked at my comics. Here are some of my recent favs: (note: if you click on them they will show up bigger on another screen)
<br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal">
<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjM0CHU0puFu9m3xMh5lgVVvlhD_exkzhrTDzPcOnbSepcMRI-S6Yfgh63oBj-PwcwK061juEyGsaqIg4Ho5KA_e769CKsTopGocpyw5JE-oFi99lToeHYDnfk3feey4HrbgsqhbXYdtR7b/s1600-h/being+cold.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 131px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjM0CHU0puFu9m3xMh5lgVVvlhD_exkzhrTDzPcOnbSepcMRI-S6Yfgh63oBj-PwcwK061juEyGsaqIg4Ho5KA_e769CKsTopGocpyw5JE-oFi99lToeHYDnfk3feey4HrbgsqhbXYdtR7b/s400/being+cold.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5434646603890679490" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipoU-B-zahyv-wr2gLRs9L3J4H_ZxbY5ZtvOCX4v5moRgf7YEv_hGQOJhaRyLiisN94upVsn6cRCz2A-u0tSTIp2D5Z9ZGtIbH5KRDLYaFWlLiEP68jConpWXWyo1McAhIsAvsJIylQZBZ/s1600-h/960322.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 129px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipoU-B-zahyv-wr2gLRs9L3J4H_ZxbY5ZtvOCX4v5moRgf7YEv_hGQOJhaRyLiisN94upVsn6cRCz2A-u0tSTIp2D5Z9ZGtIbH5KRDLYaFWlLiEP68jConpWXWyo1McAhIsAvsJIylQZBZ/s400/960322.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5434646592690578178" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcJSgnbUYKBW13Gt89CZANA_6RZUm3KTeA8OWInSoqL0OlYwmKD-TKOXVq0Q5N-vTO6FGeAYKUacBVT-f6biAmTixyOaKurQ3EU7saGzrSbT35iEhswgql1j4zkPDm0P3H6jemVJZg9HIg/s1600-h/kid+music.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 129px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcJSgnbUYKBW13Gt89CZANA_6RZUm3KTeA8OWInSoqL0OlYwmKD-TKOXVq0Q5N-vTO6FGeAYKUacBVT-f6biAmTixyOaKurQ3EU7saGzrSbT35iEhswgql1j4zkPDm0P3H6jemVJZg9HIg/s400/kid+music.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5434646587933590466" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF9b_yGqrWtEITPtMfHn6pmC4kOW0kFxYe0eTJ2WaltieMWT4CfvkUOk_uB2oEh9Eo2VH_6HSk0UcghKXNqKCOalMREQWpjAI4WjaenW1KtENE5xddDBqmke_kg5HuLeFxMpZb_ka2zfbr/s1600-h/babysitting+coop.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 131px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF9b_yGqrWtEITPtMfHn6pmC4kOW0kFxYe0eTJ2WaltieMWT4CfvkUOk_uB2oEh9Eo2VH_6HSk0UcghKXNqKCOalMREQWpjAI4WjaenW1KtENE5xddDBqmke_kg5HuLeFxMpZb_ka2zfbr/s400/babysitting+coop.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5434646585624750786" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf_yBgJXxSvkBgUbYAJJZjMVeNQou8J1JmWxMJOk0B9YMl-dZ01avcd0-Gy73CvzA8MMK8QFhDoF2qQprix4vOeSkWHd53c6S1ZjA08F-C37anqRZe0OEJfEUd4S0tVc_DEtVgdQo6jMVu/s1600-h/breastfeeding.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 131px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf_yBgJXxSvkBgUbYAJJZjMVeNQou8J1JmWxMJOk0B9YMl-dZ01avcd0-Gy73CvzA8MMK8QFhDoF2qQprix4vOeSkWHd53c6S1ZjA08F-C37anqRZe0OEJfEUd4S0tVc_DEtVgdQo6jMVu/s400/breastfeeding.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5434646580054811138" border="0" /></a></p> <meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><meta name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CHome%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><link rel="themeData" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CHome%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_themedata.thmx"><link rel="colorSchemeMapping" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CHome%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_colorschememapping.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:trackmoves/> <w:trackformatting/> <w:punctuationkerning/> <w:validateagainstschemas/> <w:saveifxmlinvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:ignoremixedcontent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:alwaysshowplaceholdertext>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:donotpromoteqf/> <w:lidthemeother>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther> <w:lidthemeasian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:lidthemecomplexscript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:dontgrowautofit/> <w:splitpgbreakandparamark/> <w:dontvertaligncellwithsp/> <w:dontbreakconstrainedforcedtables/> <w:dontvertalignintxbx/> <w:word11kerningpairs/> <w:cachedcolbalance/> </w:Compatibility> <w:browserlevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> <m:mathpr> <m:mathfont val="Cambria Math"> <m:brkbin val="before"> <m:brkbinsub val="--"> <m:smallfrac val="off"> <m:dispdef/> <m:lmargin val="0"> <m:rmargin val="0"> <m:defjc val="centerGroup"> <m:wrapindent val="1440"> <m:intlim val="subSup"> <m:narylim val="undOvr"> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:latentstyles deflockedstate="false" defunhidewhenused="true" defsemihidden="true" defqformat="false" defpriority="99" latentstylecount="267"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="0" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Normal"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="heading 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 7"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 8"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 9"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 7"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 8"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 9"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="35" qformat="true" name="caption"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="10" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Title"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="1" name="Default Paragraph Font"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="11" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Subtitle"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="22" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Strong"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="20" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Emphasis"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="59" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Table Grid"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Placeholder Text"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="1" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="No Spacing"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Revision"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="34" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="List Paragraph"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="29" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Quote"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="30" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Intense Quote"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="19" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Subtle Emphasis"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="21" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Intense Emphasis"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="31" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Subtle Reference"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="32" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Intense Reference"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="33" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Book Title"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="37" name="Bibliography"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" qformat="true" name="TOC Heading"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><style> <!-- /* Font Definitions */ @font-face {font-family:"Cambria Math"; panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:1; mso-generic-font-family:roman; mso-font-format:other; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:0 0 0 0 0 0;} @font-face {font-family:Calibri; panose-1:2 15 5 2 2 2 4 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:0; mso-generic-font-family:swiss; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:-1610611985 1073750139 0 0 159 0;} /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-unhide:no; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} .MsoChpDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; mso-default-props:yes; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.0in 1.0in 1.0in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> </style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">(I really relate to Baby Blues. Have I said that? Cause I do…)</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Anyway, by the time I had laughed a little and relaxed, I had fifteen minutes to prepare for Sunday before Jack woke up.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">I just wonder when I will catch on to <i style="">me</i>. I need to make my plans not just around Jack’s schedule, but around my own. I need to acknowledge my needs and prepare for them like I prepare for Jack’s naps. It’s complicated caring for a baby. I hope I can learn to care for myself too otherwise I don’t know how I would survive with another one.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Which reminds me of another comic…</span></p><p class="MsoNormal">
<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcvNhP_IL0jO82dYe1W6KlMbTrjHHfz9VaWk3CxlmgOlOthwGbWiASti_5_Dai9e5GBxxh0URhS3j2JaSISRasAzL_t7prEuIyXViTYjwy_cJC8mExEvLX4XIONuabmp1nsQr0FFenPWFv/s1600-h/coping.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 125px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcvNhP_IL0jO82dYe1W6KlMbTrjHHfz9VaWk3CxlmgOlOthwGbWiASti_5_Dai9e5GBxxh0URhS3j2JaSISRasAzL_t7prEuIyXViTYjwy_cJC8mExEvLX4XIONuabmp1nsQr0FFenPWFv/s400/coping.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5434647213188489186" border="0" /></a></p> Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-71555695499617882512010-01-28T22:17:00.000-08:002010-01-30T07:28:56.788-08:00My Own PaceI have begun to wonder when will be the next time Tim and I try to get pregnant again. Well, last time we didn't exactly try... but we didn't try to not try. Make sense? ;)<br /><div><div></div><br /><div>Anyways, there are many factors to consider.<br />1) Tim will be in school for at least another year.<br />2) Jack isn't crawling or walking yet and I want to have a mobile child when I'm pregnant.</div><div>3) I really don't want more than one child under the age of 2... or even 2 1/2 for that matter.</div><div>4) The thought of the first three months of both pregnancy and after birth make me squeemish. </div><div></div><br /><div>On the other hand</div><div>1) More than once I have seen a newborn and thought, "Aw... I want one... I think?"</div><div>2) ... </div><br /><div></div><div>Ok, I guess that's it. I have no urgency for trying again at this time. But the thoughts have begun to cross my mind and they do surprise me. Not too long ago any such thoughts made me want to run far far away. I've heard that by 15 months you forget all of the bad and long for the good. At nearly 14 months I'm beginning to see what they mean.</div><br /><div></div><div>Yikes!</div><br /><div></div><div>Whatever the case, I think it is safe to say I will take Wanda's advice:</div><br /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 126px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5432045062057406626" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIuW7FgOUI5sCq90-4NpZGEl2W4vx2Ap1MbZtpCIDZfpgFl5L3zOtdhuv9BdAR6uLYGw3wX846TGDtFwOmt2_eAqpMNRf6dKRtEmzJv8XHc7KJmBHmfiHKS8gpgeiTaBxSEH3MjhBkTWrt/s400/Baby_Blues+pace+yourself.gif" /><br /><br /><br /><div></div></div>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-73705392417070464032010-01-28T12:42:00.000-08:002010-01-28T13:15:58.249-08:00When do YOU shower?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0IivALBilBuOfmHONkxJiUulbpKgXn0TbdrsyNBmk5cViU1sBk2WFgE96rPAKoSCTBkIU0DCxd7hYtp0-UjGf6O6tlE3Ky4YgF4Fyc30pyGXv1_Dkn5V6JElz68lV4JLfFh94pcpREW4H/s1600-h/13313251.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 320px; FLOAT: right; HEIGHT: 256px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431895968252606690" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0IivALBilBuOfmHONkxJiUulbpKgXn0TbdrsyNBmk5cViU1sBk2WFgE96rPAKoSCTBkIU0DCxd7hYtp0-UjGf6O6tlE3Ky4YgF4Fyc30pyGXv1_Dkn5V6JElz68lV4JLfFh94pcpREW4H/s320/13313251.jpg" /></a> Today Jack and I got up at 8:30 am (I know, right? Wonderful!) and sat around watching Sesame Street until we went to the mall for some exercise. Ok, I admit mall walking is hardly an intense workout, but I need to do something and it is the only thing I have been able to do with Jack and even then he interrupts it. <div><br /><div></div><div>We did stop to watch the puppies at the pet store. Too cute!</div><div> </div><div></div><div>Anyways, Jack fell asleep on the way home. I put him to bed, grabbed some food for myself, took a few minutes to relax and was about to go shower when Jack woke up - an hour before I expected him to!</div><div> </div><div></div><div>So, no shower for me yet. Not that I'm disgustingly sweaty or anything, but I do feel a bit gross. I am not sure if Jack will take another nap today or if I will have to wait until he goes to bed for the night - which might be 8pm after sleeping in - before I can feel clean again.</div><div> </div><div></div><div>And I'm wondering, when do all of you moms shower?</div><div> </div><div></div><div>Do you wake up extra early before your kid(s) wake up? Do you take one at night? Do you do it while your kiddos are awake? I just don't know what to do today except sit around feeling a tad disgusting.</div><div></div><div> </div><div>Alright, not the most inspiring post today, I know. Just wondering if anyone smells like me... ;)</div></div>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-91533015626924736792010-01-20T20:04:00.000-08:002010-01-20T21:03:51.680-08:00Children and ChocolateIn the last year, as my love for Jack has deepened, I have also grown in compassion for other children. While poverty made me sad before, it now breaks my heart. The suffering millions are experiencing in Haiti right now is overwhelming, but the pain I feel for the parents who lost their children and for children who lost their parent(s) breaks me.<br /><br />This past year I have also become more and more aware of the reality of slavery in this world. Children are kidnapped and forced into labor, military, and, most disgusting of all, sex slavery all around the world. It is estimated that there are more than twenty seven million people enslaved today - more than any other point in history. When I start reading the facts on websites like <a href="http://www.notforsalecampaign.org/">www.notforsalecampaign.org</a> and <a href="http://www.iempathize.org/">www.iempathize.org</a> I am ready to vomit.<br /><br />And so often I have wondered, what can I do?!<br /><br />Recently it has come to my attention that both coffee and chocolate are largely produced by slaves from the Ivory Coast. The details of the child slavery <a href="http://www.foodrevolution.org/slavery_chocolate.htm">as written in this article </a>are shocking. Legislation has been passed and many chocolate companies, such as Hershey and Mars, are working to end that, but I suspect this will take a very very long time. The article I linked to above stated that there are many chocolate companies whose cocoa is not produced by slave labor including Green and Black's which I know Target sells (<a href="http://greenandblacks.com/us/what-we-make/bars/peanut-with-sea-salt.html">their website </a>has a coupon for their Peanut Bar - sounds delicious!).<br /><br />Beyond the problem of slave labor is the also serious injustice of sweatshops and "unfair trade" (is that a thing? the opposite of fair trade, that's what I'm trying to say). Cheap labor in other countries results in dire poverty for the masses. Poverty like that in Port au Prince. Every day I am becoming more and more aware that a low price for me comes at a cost to someone. I don't know enough about fair trade right now, but it is something I want to learn about and invest in. Does that mean no more shopping at Target for a good deal? I don't know right now, but I am seeking answers.<br /><br />The truth is that so much of the stuff I feel I have to have, I don't. This consumeristic mentallity I am wrapped up in (more, newer, bigger, better - I want it!) not only distracts me from the One I am truly yearning for, but it hurts so many people who cary His Image.<br /><br />One thing I do know, I can stop supporting slavery by buying different chocolate. It feels very small to change my chocolate eating habits, but for the sake of the children on the Ivory Coast - and as a stance against slavery everywhere - I will.<br /><br />God help us.Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-14680097150978659382010-01-13T07:11:00.000-08:002010-01-13T07:11:00.223-08:00Wordless Wednesday<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYAetIQie3nibwI3LrpAUysFAVF-ZbSUanVdDX1e0uPmbhd08hVPYT7ZM7B9nh4xU74S2aLVvM7_h8OPWWfz2W0Z-rhmnYhYD1b5RZSSSdGn_czmLZ0z6OhKvzC-l9NXqX8c4Yt8_2-oTC/s1600-h/IMG_1437.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 240px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 320px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5426057468309097538" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYAetIQie3nibwI3LrpAUysFAVF-ZbSUanVdDX1e0uPmbhd08hVPYT7ZM7B9nh4xU74S2aLVvM7_h8OPWWfz2W0Z-rhmnYhYD1b5RZSSSdGn_czmLZ0z6OhKvzC-l9NXqX8c4Yt8_2-oTC/s320/IMG_1437.JPG" /></a><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisd8hS2gzsLim8BDEhu2wXBC4C6nHaquV58zJFGEC9saJUSr9eH357MIyD00CiinWAwZ2VJyttaHcJQiNoNtWpSkOjJY5VzeG2UEUlnA3eUtmCL_PzUPzPwlFyL-x-7BIE5JJ2Poo7K1Bx/s1600-h/IMG_1433.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5426057460854704338" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisd8hS2gzsLim8BDEhu2wXBC4C6nHaquV58zJFGEC9saJUSr9eH357MIyD00CiinWAwZ2VJyttaHcJQiNoNtWpSkOjJY5VzeG2UEUlnA3eUtmCL_PzUPzPwlFyL-x-7BIE5JJ2Poo7K1Bx/s320/IMG_1433.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbCWnjDjMJdERtD8p5YO8IFXuf9NPuKGhrE4SNrcwBlten8z5b-ovnksfctMe8eRr9k2O0SW-jwHj-IXZMWnP3-UBv9AnVPI9UL6ANa7wkiL7CZSJZhfj_7V3N5qED1_1iOvo_gd7Iz5Ah/s1600-h/IMG_1430.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 240px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 320px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5426057457624452162" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbCWnjDjMJdERtD8p5YO8IFXuf9NPuKGhrE4SNrcwBlten8z5b-ovnksfctMe8eRr9k2O0SW-jwHj-IXZMWnP3-UBv9AnVPI9UL6ANa7wkiL7CZSJZhfj_7V3N5qED1_1iOvo_gd7Iz5Ah/s320/IMG_1430.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoL6-An2sb_Xyyalg-iguX1x6l3_MlH6EQGGDvn3T6FlqJe07BhAX5M5mqC5RZ-msk3LSTmQzwdzw9BWc_5xSHf4NkEZ5Np0yzU6O-mbeiJZCTscWW_oHUBzEVIeIftm3WGjydmO_-L6Si/s1600-h/IMG_1429.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 240px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 320px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5426057447961572802" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoL6-An2sb_Xyyalg-iguX1x6l3_MlH6EQGGDvn3T6FlqJe07BhAX5M5mqC5RZ-msk3LSTmQzwdzw9BWc_5xSHf4NkEZ5Np0yzU6O-mbeiJZCTscWW_oHUBzEVIeIftm3WGjydmO_-L6Si/s320/IMG_1429.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipyolqfzszZEIDzaFk9Ttdurhjm9B9NKhY4X7sAeZdDLp7-dna741AfRAKfZ2uBLgSuwgw4qLRzJWNhW_1WI9NxvL3dVweracWeZ9eWHWuGBLDrMT4GkuQA1GYhiep5UEtDD75vPmdky9j/s1600-h/IMG_1428.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5426057443714427186" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipyolqfzszZEIDzaFk9Ttdurhjm9B9NKhY4X7sAeZdDLp7-dna741AfRAKfZ2uBLgSuwgw4qLRzJWNhW_1WI9NxvL3dVweracWeZ9eWHWuGBLDrMT4GkuQA1GYhiep5UEtDD75vPmdky9j/s320/IMG_1428.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div></div></div></div></div></div>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-23188636349415515612010-01-11T19:34:00.000-08:002010-01-11T19:51:09.676-08:00The Not So Toothless GrinThat's right, Jack has four teeth! Two on top, two on bottom. Up until recently you still couldn't see the teeth when he smiled, but those pearly whites are becoming more visible every day. I knew the day would come when my blog name would no longer be relevant, but I'm not changing it! <div></div><br /><div>I have been amazed at the amount of time it takes for one tooth to come in. Some of my friends' babies get teeth one after another. Jack's teeth stay under the gums for weeks at a time causing swelling and one fussy baby! Every time a new tooth pops out I feel like I just got my baby back. </div><div></div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGZNdGvKwNx1Z7hW_LzbBsbFFt3prnlx0BRwj7GMEtHKnW1d0ZVX7j24Okw8R14uRCZUtgqhJqhyHkJX7kTPpyoTW9p5s0d6yB0nKAYF1neZPHCgnkGYs8otxWQ2J-8ak-sNL_O_Fla45-/s1600-h/IMG_1436.JPG"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 320px; FLOAT: right; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5425693886171098546" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGZNdGvKwNx1Z7hW_LzbBsbFFt3prnlx0BRwj7GMEtHKnW1d0ZVX7j24Okw8R14uRCZUtgqhJqhyHkJX7kTPpyoTW9p5s0d6yB0nKAYF1neZPHCgnkGYs8otxWQ2J-8ak-sNL_O_Fla45-/s320/IMG_1436.JPG" /></a><br /><div>My favorite thing about the teeth is not just his adorable smile, but the fact that now he can eat table foods! Most of the time he eats whatever we eat and it is so cute to see him nibble on a Cheerio or shove an entire pancake in his mouth. Tonight we had spaghetti. (Can you see the teeth?)</div><br /><div></div><div></div><div>Needless to say, Jack went straight from the table to the tub where he proceeded to splash and soak me. Then, when I wash washing his hair, he grabbed my arm and bit me.</div><div> </div><div>Yes, I have a biter.</div><div> </div><div>I never thought that would happen! My sweet little boy bites? Jack has also bit Tim while Tim was cutting his nails and me on other occassions. And he bites hard! I'm not sure what to do about this except say "no." But that seems to be really ineffective. Has anyone else had to deal with this? I'm just glad he's not known at a day care as "the kid who bites other babies." Nope, he's just the kid who bites me. :)</div>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-8436988741345041482010-01-08T18:59:00.000-08:002010-01-08T19:41:55.217-08:00Playing HouseGoing home for Christmas was great. We relaxed, spent time with family, and everyone else took care of Jack! This was probably the best vacation we have had since Jack was born simply because he is so much more independent and I am no longer nursing him. I mean we were able to give him a bottle in the car on the drive to Wisconsin! No 45 minute stops for feedings. And he can feed himself with finger food and plays with toys... it's great. Oh and he loves people so he enjoyed every single person who picked him up.<br /><br />And I got a break.<br /><br />You know, it's funny, though I've been a mom for a year, I still feel like I'm "playing house." Whenever I get a break from caring for Jack, especially when my mom is here and basically takes over (which is always such a relief), I feel like this is how it should be. She's the real mom, I have just been playing make believe.<br /><br />Last night Jack woke up screaming and I picked him up to comfort him. As I rocked him, I looked at that sleeping baby and thought "I feel like such a kid and here I am... a mom!" I have been referring to myself as "Mommy" since December 4th, 2008 and that seemed natural, but now Jack is calling for me saying "Ma ma ma" and it is so bizarre! I don't feel like a mom. Most of the time I still feel like a teenager trying to figure out life!<br /><br />It astounds me that Jack loves me the way I love my mom. I am the one turns to for comfort. I am the one he gives sloppy kisses to. I am the one he cuddles with every night.<br /><br />On another note, it is so much fun to see Jack adore Tim, his "Da da." Whenever Tim walks into the room Jack's little face lights up and he practically lunges out of my arms squealing with delight. They have a special bond and Tim is such a natural dad.<br /><br />Though at times this all feels unnatural, I love my family. Jack is such a wonderful blessing and Tim such a loving dad and husband, I thank God they are part of my life.<br /><br />So I will keep on playing house. Maybe some day I will feel like a natural mom.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUenaiAafhIhv5ZXKibDySHZsOD65BAW-ldcsaFU2zac6BikwopH1hu-dNYZJkcioaMyr-akxOWD9TxVwwiLOtjhyba-Np_R8gtLCLjh1wIpaVAmdIQ0i-tavvQGdoFcqVT9YqzCGiFm6_/s1600-h/IMG_1401.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUenaiAafhIhv5ZXKibDySHZsOD65BAW-ldcsaFU2zac6BikwopH1hu-dNYZJkcioaMyr-akxOWD9TxVwwiLOtjhyba-Np_R8gtLCLjh1wIpaVAmdIQ0i-tavvQGdoFcqVT9YqzCGiFm6_/s320/IMG_1401.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424579962758460290" border="0" /></a>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-16757246136049368772009-12-08T13:59:00.000-08:002009-12-09T07:08:13.490-08:00One Year<meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><meta name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CHome%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><link rel="themeData" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CHome%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_themedata.thmx"><link rel="colorSchemeMapping" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CHome%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_colorschememapping.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:trackmoves/> <w:trackformatting/> <w:punctuationkerning/> <w:validateagainstschemas/> <w:saveifxmlinvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:ignoremixedcontent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:alwaysshowplaceholdertext>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:donotpromoteqf/> <w:lidthemeother>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther> <w:lidthemeasian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:lidthemecomplexscript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:dontgrowautofit/> <w:splitpgbreakandparamark/> <w:dontvertaligncellwithsp/> <w:dontbreakconstrainedforcedtables/> <w:dontvertalignintxbx/> <w:word11kerningpairs/> <w:cachedcolbalance/> </w:Compatibility> <m:mathpr> <m:mathfont val="Cambria Math"> <m:brkbin val="before"> <m:brkbinsub val="--"> <m:smallfrac val="off"> <m:dispdef/> <m:lmargin val="0"> <m:rmargin val="0"> <m:defjc val="centerGroup"> <m:wrapindent val="1440"> <m:intlim val="subSup"> <m:narylim val="undOvr"> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:latentstyles deflockedstate="false" defunhidewhenused="true" defsemihidden="true" defqformat="false" defpriority="99" latentstylecount="267"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="0" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Normal"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="heading 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 7"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 8"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 9"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 7"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 8"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 9"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="35" qformat="true" name="caption"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="10" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Title"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="1" name="Default Paragraph Font"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="11" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Subtitle"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="22" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Strong"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="20" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Emphasis"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="59" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Table Grid"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Placeholder Text"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="1" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="No Spacing"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Revision"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="34" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="List Paragraph"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="29" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Quote"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="30" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Intense Quote"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="19" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Subtle Emphasis"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="21" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Intense Emphasis"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="31" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Subtle Reference"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="32" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Intense Reference"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="33" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Book Title"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="37" name="Bibliography"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" qformat="true" name="TOC Heading"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><style> <!-- /* Font Definitions */ @font-face {font-family:"Cambria Math"; panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:1; mso-generic-font-family:roman; mso-font-format:other; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:0 0 0 0 0 0;} @font-face {font-family:Calibri; panose-1:2 15 5 2 2 2 4 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:0; mso-generic-font-family:swiss; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:-1610611985 1073750139 0 0 159 0;} /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-unhide:no; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} .MsoChpDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; mso-default-props:yes; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.0in 1.0in 1.0in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> </style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--> <p class="MsoNormal">I finally have a moment to sit down and write! Yay for delayed appointments!</p><p class="MsoNormal">
<br /></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Friday was Jack’s birthday. I can’t believe my little boy is one! And in other ways I feel like the past year was at least two years’ time. Seriously, I felt like the first three months were never going to end. But they did and the next nine months were times of giggles and exploration. It is such a joy for me to see Jack experience something new for the first time. He recently rediscovered his toes and sucks on them while I’m changing his diaper. Why? I don’t know. But it is adorable. And tonight he had a ball figuring out how to roll around the room.
<br /></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">
<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal">I was watching Ellen last week and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHkWwJ4bmfg">Minnie Driver was on</a>. Minnie glowed as she talked about her 15 month old son Henry and shared a video of him making animal sounds (it was adorable by the way – something else to look forward to with Jack!). Minnie – why do I feel like I’m talking about Minnie Mouse? – said that she never knew she could love this much. She said “Every day you think you can’t love them anymore and you do. It’s extraordinary you find that you have an ever expanding heart which is a magical thing to discover.” I can totally relate.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">
<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal">At this time I can't help but be reflective. I remember a little over a year ago, when I was still very very pregnant, pulling out my Christmas music and listening to Amy Grant’s “Breath of Heaven.” While I always loved the mysterious, beautiful melody, the words took on new meaning to me as I was “weary with a babe inside.” Mary’s prayer became very personal to me as I also prayed:</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><i style="">
<br /></i></p><p class="MsoNormal"><i style="">I am waiting in a silent prayer
<br />I am frightened by the load I bear
<br />In a world as cold as stone <o:p></o:p></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><i style="">Must I walk this path alone
<br />Be with me now
<br />Be with me now<o:p></o:p></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><i style="">
<br />Breath of Heaven
<br />Hold me together
<br />Be forever near me
<br />Breath of Heaven
<br />Breath of Heaven
<br />Lighten my darkness
<br />Pour over me, your holyness
<br />For your holy Breath of Heaven
<br /><!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]-->
<br /><!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Today my prayer remains the same. I am utterly dependent on my Father to be with me now. To lighten my darkness. To guide me in this cold world that is such a fallen state of its original Eden. I need Him to comfort me as a mother. I need Him to guide me in raising my son. I need to know that He is always there.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">
<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal">If I can say anything about this past year it is that God has been faithful to me. He has revealed to me that He was there when I didn’t feel Him. He has taught me about the depth of His love for me through my love for my son. He has held me when I cried. He has led me to healing from the agony of depression. But most of all, He has loved me.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">
<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal">I hope someday Jack also knows that love.
<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">
<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal">We had a few friends over to celebrate Jack’s birthday. He enjoyed his first taste of sugar with his birthday cake, reunited with his old friend Amaya, grinned at his new friend Beck and loved his gifts! Enjoy these snapshots and videos!</p><p class="MsoNormal">
<br /></p> <iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dxzcK4h5ofqi3vUgzl6nq-JZpzxzugJurUG9X5fXQT1v9wMARhiY5E21sKM389HEaHXBmg8bCEpjOGalVBqsQ' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-26286638060382288772009-11-30T20:24:00.000-08:002009-11-30T21:46:27.047-08:00A More Substantial UpdateOK. I am going to finally post a couple of pictures of the apartment. I kept waiting and waiting because I wanted everything to be in its place in order to impress you all, but tonight I realized things will <span style="font-style: italic;">never</span> be in their place. This is <span style="font-style: italic;">me</span> we're talking about! So here's the living room (please note the beautiful gas fireplace):<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLIES9cVBsXk5RUh_wd6V5_K1c_vMTgs0VlhRH_i_K3hLFM0GnJVzlY-1-_QBe_cJBwwZpqVbMNVrqeyzy6Msz1ztIXPiBqa3piQh7l4_rx7lXX7GpXl32NdYYQ-YLSgxygv5yyIRyd3uK/s1600/IMG_1311.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLIES9cVBsXk5RUh_wd6V5_K1c_vMTgs0VlhRH_i_K3hLFM0GnJVzlY-1-_QBe_cJBwwZpqVbMNVrqeyzy6Msz1ztIXPiBqa3piQh7l4_rx7lXX7GpXl32NdYYQ-YLSgxygv5yyIRyd3uK/s320/IMG_1311.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5410135244249794082" border="0" /></a>And here's our kitchen:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqNIsvmclc40oqcqhPsp_nEiJN1I04ST9elpwu390n_M3h8EBtXIMYa3yKfV1LLGvNo2D55ztnjbSBnzVzPwd8mUZS8jN4Zp_mIK5HkdMUytX1dmFtCsUorQQhj1oReKIEGQdXfItL0A1M/s1600/IMG_1312.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqNIsvmclc40oqcqhPsp_nEiJN1I04ST9elpwu390n_M3h8EBtXIMYa3yKfV1LLGvNo2D55ztnjbSBnzVzPwd8mUZS8jN4Zp_mIK5HkdMUytX1dmFtCsUorQQhj1oReKIEGQdXfItL0A1M/s320/IMG_1312.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5410135256353385922" border="0" /></a><br />We used to have about a third of the cabinet and counter space as we do now. I cooked our Thanksgiving dinner and not once struggled to find a place to put something! Wow!<br /><br />Oh, here's us at Thanksgiving. I look too perky. Tim is mellow. And Jack is distracted. Pretty typical.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjNHetbMUswvCK2ToVEOZFl2kxdWOWV-1fifHeyusN4Ki00-J1rSP-shndgkVcC9M5II4HtBOS96JcYDkB-sAezaH5i37i2yqATdYXqJx44fFVzhlEa6EwFSspURrt2bAMlOvicdqUKnAy/s1600/IMG_1309.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjNHetbMUswvCK2ToVEOZFl2kxdWOWV-1fifHeyusN4Ki00-J1rSP-shndgkVcC9M5II4HtBOS96JcYDkB-sAezaH5i37i2yqATdYXqJx44fFVzhlEa6EwFSspURrt2bAMlOvicdqUKnAy/s320/IMG_1309.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5410135261911472210" border="0" /></a><br />These pictures do not really do our apartment justice (I'm a writer, not a photographer - someone wanna teach me how to take good pictures?). Let's just say, I love our new place. It is so refreshing. The first night we were here everything was so clean! I felt like we were in a hotel! And then three days later reality set in as I had to clean. Ugh. Whatever. This place is so light and open. The lay out is easy and is actually really helpful for me with maintaining things. We used to have two levels and I could never seem to get things back upstairs after bringing them down. NOW the laundry area is right next to our bedrooms. So practical.<br /><br />Now for a little heart to heart. Settling in is not the only reason I have not written for some time. The other reason is I really needed time to heal and recover. Actually, I still need some time. I do not want to spew all of my thoughts and feelings all over the internet as it can be so easy to do in the blog world. After the move, I was pretty emotionally and psychologically crippled for about a week. Thankfully my mom came to help us settle in and I was able to rest.<br /><br />In the last month I have realized several areas of hurt that have kept me down. On top of that, I have accepted the fact that depression is an illness. It is not my fault. There is nothing I did or didn't do that brought this on me. I am on an anti-depressant now that has made a huge difference. Sure, at times I am anxious or feel as though there's a weight on my shoulders, but not every day. Actually, this weekend I felt lighthearted and happy. It is such a relief.<br /><br />Thank you all for your prayers. Thank you for your support. And thank you for loving me. I know my battle with depression is not over, but because I <span style="font-style: italic;">know</span> God is with me I have hope. I would like to share more about this journey with you another time. Right now I need to get to bed.<br /><br />Goodnight!Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-80201857791752940612009-11-21T18:47:00.000-08:002009-11-21T18:56:16.875-08:00I'm back!Wow, it has been more than two weeks since I have written anything. And honestly, I have needed the time off. Not that blogging is work or anything, but the last two weeks have been a huge adjustment. In case you don't remember, we moved!!<br /><br />I don't have any fun pictures of the apartment yet (there are still boxes lying around the living room and things that need to find their place), but I do have this:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGOdm7K1D-p8P-5y73INhehQHNpvaRvSXy5y3-SIlutibkx8IBPNxDY5v8RCAe1Z8uvVq7etHqDgZZHGkA5WWUfMDiXxfXInsakuLmJMXir2MHFdA67lKbfcXJNseOVulweRkwmn4UyAtM/s1600/IMG_1300.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGOdm7K1D-p8P-5y73INhehQHNpvaRvSXy5y3-SIlutibkx8IBPNxDY5v8RCAe1Z8uvVq7etHqDgZZHGkA5WWUfMDiXxfXInsakuLmJMXir2MHFdA67lKbfcXJNseOVulweRkwmn4UyAtM/s320/IMG_1300.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5406755764981791074" border="0" /></a><br />That's right! We invested in a brand new, front loading, energy efficient, sanitizing, <span style="font-style: italic;">silver</span> washer and dryer! Jack sat watching the clothes spin for at least fifteen minutes. Actually... we all did. Seriously, it's mesmerizing.<br /><br />More to come!Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-9628703523521964802009-11-05T21:08:00.000-08:002009-11-05T21:19:41.769-08:00Rock Me to Sleep...<meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><meta name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 12"><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CHome%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><link rel="themeData" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CHome%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_themedata.thmx"><link rel="colorSchemeMapping" href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CHome%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_colorschememapping.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:trackmoves/> <w:trackformatting/> <w:punctuationkerning/> <w:validateagainstschemas/> <w:saveifxmlinvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:ignoremixedcontent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:alwaysshowplaceholdertext>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:donotpromoteqf/> <w:lidthemeother>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther> <w:lidthemeasian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:lidthemecomplexscript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:dontgrowautofit/> <w:splitpgbreakandparamark/> <w:dontvertaligncellwithsp/> <w:dontbreakconstrainedforcedtables/> <w:dontvertalignintxbx/> <w:word11kerningpairs/> <w:cachedcolbalance/> </w:Compatibility> <w:browserlevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> <m:mathpr> <m:mathfont val="Cambria Math"> <m:brkbin val="before"> <m:brkbinsub val="--"> <m:smallfrac val="off"> <m:dispdef/> <m:lmargin val="0"> <m:rmargin val="0"> <m:defjc val="centerGroup"> <m:wrapindent val="1440"> <m:intlim val="subSup"> <m:narylim val="undOvr"> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:latentstyles deflockedstate="false" defunhidewhenused="true" defsemihidden="true" defqformat="false" defpriority="99" latentstylecount="267"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="0" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Normal"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="heading 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 7"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 8"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="9" qformat="true" name="heading 9"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 7"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 8"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" name="toc 9"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="35" qformat="true" name="caption"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="10" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Title"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="1" name="Default Paragraph Font"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="11" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Subtitle"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="22" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Strong"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="20" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Emphasis"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="59" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Table Grid"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Placeholder Text"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="1" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="No Spacing"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Revision"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="34" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="List Paragraph"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="29" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Quote"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="30" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Intense Quote"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="60" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Shading Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="61" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light List Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="62" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Light Grid Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="63" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="64" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="65" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="66" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="67" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="68" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="69" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="70" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Dark List Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="71" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="72" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful List Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="73" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="19" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Subtle Emphasis"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="21" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Intense Emphasis"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="31" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Subtle Reference"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="32" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Intense Reference"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="33" semihidden="false" unhidewhenused="false" qformat="true" name="Book Title"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="37" name="Bibliography"> <w:lsdexception locked="false" priority="39" qformat="true" name="TOC Heading"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><style> <!-- /* Font Definitions */ @font-face {font-family:"Cambria Math"; panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:1; mso-generic-font-family:roman; mso-font-format:other; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:0 0 0 0 0 0;} @font-face {font-family:Calibri; panose-1:2 15 5 2 2 2 4 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:0; mso-generic-font-family:swiss; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:-1610611985 1073750139 0 0 159 0;} /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-unhide:no; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; margin-top:0in; margin-right:0in; margin-bottom:10.0pt; margin-left:0in; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} .MsoChpDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; mso-default-props:yes; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} .MsoPapDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; margin-bottom:10.0pt; line-height:115%;} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.0in 1.0in 1.0in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> </style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0in; mso-para-margin-right:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0in; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--> <p class="MsoNormal">I find myself swirling in the downward spiral of self-doubt and low self-esteem. I am overwhelmed with packing, I feel I’m not doing or haven’t done enough to make Saturday successful and so I feel bad about myself. The pain is back in my chest, the hurt over not feeling loved, not feeling valuable.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg33vvrLoF6Dq260fx9XzMj96hpYfsZKyT20b66FLQAPu_iItGlrLLeD8-x7J3eEzhCs2qTyij9cuiu1Q24UkuLly5hEWcWXSwi35avT-dv8NmTqpuFZwvFmnyOFOik918Hj6iY-AKddgP0/s1600-h/IMG_1236+-+Copy.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 200px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg33vvrLoF6Dq260fx9XzMj96hpYfsZKyT20b66FLQAPu_iItGlrLLeD8-x7J3eEzhCs2qTyij9cuiu1Q24UkuLly5hEWcWXSwi35avT-dv8NmTqpuFZwvFmnyOFOik918Hj6iY-AKddgP0/s200/IMG_1236+-+Copy.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400854426724318210" border="0" /></a></p> <p class="MsoNormal">And I am trying to hear the truth that I am not valuable because of what I <i style="">do</i>. I just am valuable. I am loveable because I am. And because God is God.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">I was just rocking Jack back to sleep (which I felt guilty for because I haven’t been consistent about letting him cry it out – whatever “it” is) and, as I was wrestling with God over these issues, I looked down at Jack’s hands folded over his tummy which rose and fell with each deep breath. I was in awe of him and love for him swelled in my heart.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><i style="">That’s how God loves me.</i></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The thought came out of nowhere (or maybe sent from Him…) and I am still processing it. God loves me not because of what I do. God loves me because I exist. Because each person is infinitely valuable, loveable and precious.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">That’s such a different message from what the world says. There are so many messages that bombard us. There are “the shoulds.” There are the titles, awards, and hierarchies which tell us who is important, who is successful. There are the advertisements that tell us if we had this hair, that cell phone or ate that food, <i style="">then</i> we would be somebody.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><i style="">“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: <span style="">While</span> we <span style="">were</span> still <span style="">sinners</span>, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8).<o:p></o:p></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Did you get that? Before you did anything – right or wrong – God loved you and pursued you. The Bible is a grand love story of God pursuing our fallen human race. The laws in the Old Testament were set in place to purify us so we could commune with Him. Christ died to cleanse us so we could have an intimate relationship with Him.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">And tonight God loves me even though I am not perfect. He loves me in the midst of the messages saying I'm not enough. He loves me even though I put Jack in front of the TV to get work done. He loves me even though I packed a box too heavy tonight. And he loves me even though not everything will be packed by Saturday.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">I imagine Him rocking me to sleep tonight… </p> <p class="MsoNormal">watching me take deep breathes… </p> <p class="MsoNormal">loving me. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><i style="">God, please help me accept your love and live in the freedom of the Beloved.<o:p></o:p></i></p> Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-32716716122095981932009-11-03T09:37:00.000-08:002009-11-03T10:00:14.510-08:00An UpdateOn Saturday my little Jack became a...<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipEPY3aP_7siZMNgQo4Gmp0qnSaaBBbHj0X-gDs6xOr6TFyYJtXex-sYY3MAqnq1BBQ-gzKiog980VjJ0KcpAFQ0UgtEhUo14z5X3VNg4WWkNL8TDw_Ie5qG1YysjzVo7FFDHWoTkcs6_z/s1600-h/IMG_1279.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipEPY3aP_7siZMNgQo4Gmp0qnSaaBBbHj0X-gDs6xOr6TFyYJtXex-sYY3MAqnq1BBQ-gzKiog980VjJ0KcpAFQ0UgtEhUo14z5X3VNg4WWkNL8TDw_Ie5qG1YysjzVo7FFDHWoTkcs6_z/s320/IMG_1279.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5399933382397324754" border="0" /></a><br />After I went to the fabric store and couldn't find the right fake fur for the <a href="http://thetoothlessgrin.blogspot.com/2009/10/halloween-costume-idea.html">skunk idea</a> I gave up and bought a costume. Yeah, I didn't try very hard... but even that was a lot of effort for me.<br /><br />I've mentioned a few times <a href="http://thetoothlessgrin.blogspot.com/2009/10/brighten-my-heart.html">my struggle with depression</a>. Well, in the last few weeks it has gotten much worse. I haven't cared much about doing anything and the little energy I had went into daily life; however, even those few chores I have been able to do have taken the life out of me. I don't know how to describe it except when I would look at the dishes on the counter I felt pain in my gut. As though every chore was a personal insult that struck me at my core.<br /><br />Last week, in the middle of the major snowstorm here in Denver, I went in to the doctor and am now on an anti-depressant. The hope I feel just knowing that it is going to get better soon is helping me through each day. Soon I'm going to be myself again! Wow. That is awesome.<br /><br />I write all of this because many of you have told me your own struggles. I want you to know you are not alone. And I encourage you to seek help. There are some amazing therapists, friends, and doctors out there who can help you. They've helped me.<br /><br />And maybe next year I'll have the energy to make Jack this costume:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuzWa_qpRESUphpQNWqaG0LMhPcurdglmSt3rkZS0XZiyzxrRBDjc4XknFLvFoonc8FxwSx4gXEdzCr-bPBP91kRT8TNz14Yi6fuz6dBrM2cAzn3y0pL9P54tEJ28hCN7A8cLhDGuMzK5h/s1600-h/lion.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuzWa_qpRESUphpQNWqaG0LMhPcurdglmSt3rkZS0XZiyzxrRBDjc4XknFLvFoonc8FxwSx4gXEdzCr-bPBP91kRT8TNz14Yi6fuz6dBrM2cAzn3y0pL9P54tEJ28hCN7A8cLhDGuMzK5h/s320/lion.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5399936926607865154" border="0" /></a>Maybe...<br /><br />p.s. Now that I'm feeling a little better, I hope to start writing on a regular basis again. Thanks for reading!Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-25883780566145453952009-10-26T12:26:00.000-07:002009-10-26T13:22:15.403-07:00Keep Holding OnQuinn's pregnant.<br /><br />Everyone knows.<br /><br />She's devastated.<br /><br />The glee club sings to her "Keep Holding On."<br /><br />And in one moment, Kurt looks at Quinn with such empathy, such love, I felt I saw God.<br /><br />A couple of weeks ago I shared my current struggle with depression. Since then, I have received encouragement from others who are share my struggle. I have also felt myself growing more exhausted with daily life.<br /><br />But while watching <a href="http://www.hulu.com/glee">Glee</a> yesterday afternoon, in that one moment, with that one look from Kurt, tied with those words, I heard God say, "I'm hear for you." He's there with a love that keeps loving no matter where we find ourselves, no matter what we've done, what we feel, what we think of ourselves.<br /><br />So, like me, keeping holding on to that love. We'll make it through.<br /><br /><object height="296" width="512"><param name="movie" value="http://www.hulu.com/embed/91JS7ynbljWPyVCZ2SP5_w/2429/2569/i2527"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.hulu.com/embed/91JS7ynbljWPyVCZ2SP5_w/2429/2569/i2527" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="296" width="512"></embed></object>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-66391134954920469352009-10-23T15:10:00.000-07:002009-10-23T15:27:26.644-07:00The Lord Bless You and Keep YouSeveral months ago I began singing to Jack the same beautiful song, "The Choral Benediction," every night. Well... the song is beautiful, my singing is not always all that great. In high school, our choir sang this song to close every concert. Below is a video from youtube a member of my sister's choir took during their performance of "the Choral Ben" in Vatican Square.<br /><br />Recently, Jack has begun to "sing" along with me. It is so sweet to hear his voice linger on one note and even seem to carry the rhythm of the song. The other night, I swear he tried to sing "Amen."<br /><br />The words to the song are from Numbers 6:24-26, often referred to as "Aaron's Prayer."<br /><br />This is also my prayer for you today.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">The Lord bless you and keep you.<br />The Lord lift his countenance upon you<br />and give you peace.<br />The Lord make his face to shine upon you<br />and be gracious unto you.<br />Amen<br /></span><br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/_X0fuvftVl4&hl=en&fs=1&"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/_X0fuvftVl4&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-855280917790878142009-10-21T14:15:00.000-07:002009-10-21T14:22:09.066-07:00Wordless Wednesday: Favorite Body Parts Edition<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMfVB2hGndUplPZinYsMp5QprqMpPdV5YaVLaE5Bj1BlDkbh4qA3KvgXQJpj9dLeoHIyzL16HsZ7uE5s4ZZIDChGBWsozP79AUkqHz0b9aa-Li88h0lEayxvUkKohLoyhyPQT8ujwa-g4P/s1600-h/IMG_1234.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMfVB2hGndUplPZinYsMp5QprqMpPdV5YaVLaE5Bj1BlDkbh4qA3KvgXQJpj9dLeoHIyzL16HsZ7uE5s4ZZIDChGBWsozP79AUkqHz0b9aa-Li88h0lEayxvUkKohLoyhyPQT8ujwa-g4P/s320/IMG_1234.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5395166177156125682" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTeVuxcUf6LwOXpFn_UXbaizIX86DKbtyKpPqm3_tQRX6DJ1XmVlCaqjfGslHPxqjnqzDOzua5Gi17qT5yqJ3embt7MA_x20uimPilYK5nUoKbTgEF5LAHC7y_xQx6cl-Lf2mLLNrH_5gH/s1600-h/IMG_1230.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTeVuxcUf6LwOXpFn_UXbaizIX86DKbtyKpPqm3_tQRX6DJ1XmVlCaqjfGslHPxqjnqzDOzua5Gi17qT5yqJ3embt7MA_x20uimPilYK5nUoKbTgEF5LAHC7y_xQx6cl-Lf2mLLNrH_5gH/s320/IMG_1230.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5395166173657136882" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOn6pLAnHnydbaEFeZ89UB7v1ryrM1LNUsSt2RsM64KrHjl_770GWeSKhVyPH6ZKYIiSyFvWEYeGFqCZH8KyF4dB3_5gOj_59EbteMootsQhS_K7BU0QqNU2lGYsSS8XHCOJJIqQQ5YZCF/s1600-h/IMG_1229.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOn6pLAnHnydbaEFeZ89UB7v1ryrM1LNUsSt2RsM64KrHjl_770GWeSKhVyPH6ZKYIiSyFvWEYeGFqCZH8KyF4dB3_5gOj_59EbteMootsQhS_K7BU0QqNU2lGYsSS8XHCOJJIqQQ5YZCF/s320/IMG_1229.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5395166168884730290" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFRWrKeZi6aqXh9cTI36khyphenhyphenvtGAFKxqurU6zv5yPt_wlcsQh3yMmwe2fJfNmtYHfnyrZvqTgAXJ71PIeOwujOvoIjTlSoDLhqGglvoori6teYm6XIa1mJYOPhjPG-wvQSk6AX-2KewGzsG/s1600-h/IMG_1228.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFRWrKeZi6aqXh9cTI36khyphenhyphenvtGAFKxqurU6zv5yPt_wlcsQh3yMmwe2fJfNmtYHfnyrZvqTgAXJ71PIeOwujOvoIjTlSoDLhqGglvoori6teYm6XIa1mJYOPhjPG-wvQSk6AX-2KewGzsG/s320/IMG_1228.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5395166160178904594" border="0" /></a>Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-45990788741518844632009-10-19T07:07:00.000-07:002009-10-19T18:35:01.124-07:00The ShouldsFrom the days of June Cleaver (and perhaps earlier?), there have been expectations of what a mother and wife should do. While I get incredibly angry over the idea that she should be submissive - even <span style="font-style: italic;">subservient</span> to her husband, put everything aside for the sake of her children, and is responsible for the actions of everyone in her family (think about it, how many times are women shunned because her children act out), I still feel that I'm failing because I'm not accomplishing certain "shoulds."<br /><br />Last night, as I was reflecting on this, I made a list of the "shoulds" I have struggled accomplishing.<ul><li>I should have a neat house.</li><li>I should have a clean (spotless) house.</li><li>I should only eat and feed my family healthy food.</li><li>I should never turn on the tv, especially if Jack is in the room.</li><li>I should always be happy.</li><li>I should love very day.</li><li>I should never spend money on "extras" that may cause us to go over budget.</li></ul>As I have been a stay at home mom, I have had a running track in my head telling me these are the things I should be doing and that because not one of these things has been done all of the time I am failing. The message in my head is telling me that I am not a good mother or wife because there are books and papers constantly stacked on the dining room table, there are almost always dishes on the kitchen counter, and my bathroom floor has not been mopped in months (which does gross me out by the way). I am embarrassed to have friends over because my house doesn't look anything like the homes in <a href="http://www.realsimple.com/">Real Simple</a> or the <a href="http://themommyrevolution.wordpress.com/2009/10/01/organize-this-real-simple/">house porn catalogs</a> (I stole your phrase Carla!). Because I have been feeling so horrible about these things, when I start looking at everything that needs to be done in order for life to be "perfect" I become overwhelmed and am paralyzed from doing anything. Hence, the dishes stack up, the laundry piles up, and the dust builds up.<br /><br />Now don't get me wrong, as I write these things and read them I know they are ridiculous. I know that the heart is more important. I know that Jack knowing I love him and spending time with him is more important than me putting away the laundry. But it can be so hard to fight those voices when the world continues to tell you that your house should look like this (with only one toy strategically placed):<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgN-5PM5WHRrEEVIBB7n55qhTNvVoVxv2ghr6lB647NFzXCBH_CGFrb2npRWGvIk3arqUbaSTAqpsMFkWv09KU9sswFEBlxgj8Lx8sr3B8kfZZcs_cCWbZd7jdhxqlTN3lrCjnxnTmz7QCY/s1600-h/living-room-7_300.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 269px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgN-5PM5WHRrEEVIBB7n55qhTNvVoVxv2ghr6lB647NFzXCBH_CGFrb2npRWGvIk3arqUbaSTAqpsMFkWv09KU9sswFEBlxgj8Lx8sr3B8kfZZcs_cCWbZd7jdhxqlTN3lrCjnxnTmz7QCY/s320/living-room-7_300.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394332647903204994" border="0" /></a><br />and your meals should be like that:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjw-9ixSWq3lLBtrYZlsaCZdAwnCGPlJMfSV-_X1DHM1FuK8UAzZhHoNqgg1orJ4aqSUXGO3k-G5ZHCck6_Wo4VP2AXcacJLhA5TlO3esj-a-QY2NUzHW2IL0_gbhKDRefXdRtLVWlcn6h_/s1600-h/rigatoni-peppers_300.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 269px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjw-9ixSWq3lLBtrYZlsaCZdAwnCGPlJMfSV-_X1DHM1FuK8UAzZhHoNqgg1orJ4aqSUXGO3k-G5ZHCck6_Wo4VP2AXcacJLhA5TlO3esj-a-QY2NUzHW2IL0_gbhKDRefXdRtLVWlcn6h_/s320/rigatoni-peppers_300.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394332637366744418" border="0" /></a><br />While my house currently looks like this:<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBoEi6ELBA5pNQypjA8Wmk0UdHS2_2C1-rzTDFIgIV1ioJv6-Uzf2ltMw5j9W-QLQ_DU6gDfx9fyXhmXnOWetvBeJftezBCBQzN9BLE6mhGlv3VM4uPjCgPVHrEqF6zOqhmnarbNvFr0c1/s1600-h/IMG_1224.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBoEi6ELBA5pNQypjA8Wmk0UdHS2_2C1-rzTDFIgIV1ioJv6-Uzf2ltMw5j9W-QLQ_DU6gDfx9fyXhmXnOWetvBeJftezBCBQzN9BLE6mhGlv3VM4uPjCgPVHrEqF6zOqhmnarbNvFr0c1/s320/IMG_1224.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394487474324530754" border="0" /></a><br />And our lunch today was that:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizp8pBeCk_7ukDbbx2PtRS2ad-WUGfMY31evJakelCaZa_CnZcBzDSF996TYMNRZcRU9rCaKEWGLRceQKlMC_PeUfQh0L5tadlZWLlaCXvNFV_V2JBKhcCIINZUaKR8-vsltjjcSz-nDB3/s1600-h/IMG_1227.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizp8pBeCk_7ukDbbx2PtRS2ad-WUGfMY31evJakelCaZa_CnZcBzDSF996TYMNRZcRU9rCaKEWGLRceQKlMC_PeUfQh0L5tadlZWLlaCXvNFV_V2JBKhcCIINZUaKR8-vsltjjcSz-nDB3/s320/IMG_1227.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394488046896826610" border="0" /></a><br />Many years ago, when I was a sophomore at Bethel, <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Abbas-Child-Intimate-BelongingEXPANDED-Discussion/dp/1576833348/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1255967396&sr=8-3">Brennan Manning</a> came to speak at our chapel. I can remember one line from that sermon and it has been playing in my head over and over as I write this: "You shouldn't should on yourself." (try saying that ten times fast -yikes!)<br /><br />You shouldn't should on yourself.<br /><br />Why? Because God is the God of grace. He is the God of forgiveness. He is the God of healing. These shoulds put us down and damn us when "There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus" (Romans 8:1). I believe these thoughts, these shoulds that make us question our worth and our value are from the devil himself. Our enemy who seeks to destroy us when God wants us to experience life (John 10:10). When we strive after them, we are striving after an image of ourselves that in reality is worth less than who we truly are, loved by God.<br /><br />Last night, these words from Zephania 3:17 brought tears and healing as I pictured God's great love for me - messy house and all:<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">The LORD your God is with you, </span> <span style="font-style: italic;"> <br /> he is mighty to save. </span> <span style="font-style: italic;"> <br />He will take great delight in you, </span> <span style="font-style: italic;"> <br /> he will quiet you with his love, </span> <span style="font-style: italic;"> <br /> he will rejoice over you with singing.</span><br /><br />I wonder, what are your shoulds? It may be that you have no trouble keeping your house immaculate and you are gifted at whipping up delicious and nutricious meals. Do you have areas that you feel you are constantly failing in? Please, bring these hurts, these shoulds before our Father and reflect on the verse printed above.<br /><br />He delights in you.<br /><br />He rejoices over you.<br /><br />Wow.Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1450759842352137304.post-89984153895390260672009-10-15T20:38:00.000-07:002009-10-15T19:32:37.206-07:00Halloween Costume Idea<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0F6zH6KdH4b-6sYdv0M5t0tVWCyI_LeY8jtQJ3pxOHAKLPrirWsZce2rnUk5Af6TJhycWd-8MiEvhnlKmxe7RrP7taMq-FNny44GLq8ZJ-2sYcTbLtqNLqzDUWILUXttEPXPjeGy29Jsh/s1600-h/halloween+for+babies.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 127px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0F6zH6KdH4b-6sYdv0M5t0tVWCyI_LeY8jtQJ3pxOHAKLPrirWsZce2rnUk5Af6TJhycWd-8MiEvhnlKmxe7RrP7taMq-FNny44GLq8ZJ-2sYcTbLtqNLqzDUWILUXttEPXPjeGy29Jsh/s400/halloween+for+babies.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5392497785471010706" border="0" /></a><br />I love dressing up and pretending to be someone else. Growing up, I didn't even know you could <span style="font-style: italic;">buy</span> costumes because my mom always either made mine or we found some get up in the play clothes that transformed me into a Wealthy Old Maid (one of my favorites), a Black Cat (my last time out trick-or-treating), or Pinnochio (that costume was horrible by the way, mom; but I realize that Shelby had been born three weeks before Halloween that year so I now understand why we had no costumes until the night before).<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJCfkM-kTPY_kcZzSSDSBnLHvjzbLGTCqzbnKGkPo7iZcQzS_9kl9zdj3eJYaDjtgF5e1o_aota-SghSxViFS1wsDWrSBamwOFDA7s71XqLsFzvBxRElOFAMfB41rZINjgIGfim2_RlG3s/s1600-h/IMG_1221.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJCfkM-kTPY_kcZzSSDSBnLHvjzbLGTCqzbnKGkPo7iZcQzS_9kl9zdj3eJYaDjtgF5e1o_aota-SghSxViFS1wsDWrSBamwOFDA7s71XqLsFzvBxRElOFAMfB41rZINjgIGfim2_RlG3s/s320/IMG_1221.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5393018185097358530" border="0" /></a><span style="font-size:85%;">(The Halloween Page of the Scrapbook My Mom Made for Me, Click to Enlarge)</span><br /><br /></div>This year I get to have even more fun and I get to dress up my son too!! I have always wanted to dress Jack as the traditional baby pumpkin that I have seen in so many of my friends' pictures. But I have started to entertain other costume possibilities when I saw this adorable skunk costume at ReadersDigest.com:<br /><br /><img src="file:///C:/Users/Home/AppData/Local/Temp/moz-screenshot.jpg" alt="" /><img src="file:///C:/Users/Home/AppData/Local/Temp/moz-screenshot-1.jpg" alt="" /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9OP5eQ2JY0Xfma9U_HxrsCazvj0QzYfXvIovuiG28TFBF8BVw-lxhMo5HhfjZ6WoE-Xee2k-H6jsImRmPfYFzVMLZEVZA5wBeKXjG1GqHTAeQBsTMK4KPIQcn6DA8SaNT5PHVkIt6w8y9/s1600-h/skunk+costume.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 260px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9OP5eQ2JY0Xfma9U_HxrsCazvj0QzYfXvIovuiG28TFBF8BVw-lxhMo5HhfjZ6WoE-Xee2k-H6jsImRmPfYFzVMLZEVZA5wBeKXjG1GqHTAeQBsTMK4KPIQcn6DA8SaNT5PHVkIt6w8y9/s320/skunk+costume.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5392499915134806386" border="0" /></a><br />No one is more surprised than me that I am actually considering <span style="font-style: italic;">making</span> Jack a costume (emphasis <span>should</span> probably be on the word considering), but I found a feather boa at The Dollar Tree and now I am actually considering it! The hard part is finding black clothes for a baby - but he could be a navy blue skunk, right? It's Halloween after all! Anyone can be anything! (There are other great ideas in the article <a href="http://www.rd.com/advice-and-know-how/20-homemade-halloween-costumes/article102201.html?trkid=ERDI22938-1"><span style="font-style: italic;">20 Creative Homemade Halloween Costumes</span></a> check it out!)Leahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04120204280773960440noreply@blogger.com3