On Monday I bought a home pregnancy test.
No, I’m not pregnant, but the way I have been feeling the last week or so made me wonder. I have had an insatiable appetite, been nauseous, had cramps, and was light-headed. The way my body was acting, I thought something must have gone wrong with my birth-control and I prepared myself for the little pink line on the pregnancy test.
Negative.
Whew!
I don’t know what is wrong with my body exactly, but today I felt I may have gotten a clue. My mentor Nancy leads a ministry called Vine, Vision & Voice and I finally get to participate in it. At the end of the first session this afternoon, Nancy asked us to go outside, observe the world around us and reflect for five minutes on five qualities of the soul.
So I went outside, wandered towards a stretch of grass and lay down. I looked at our list of qualities and tried to focus on them, but all I could think over and over was, “I’m tired. I’m so tired. Oh God, I’m tired.” When the sun came out from behind the clouds I closed my eyes and those five minutes turned into an unexpected gift of rest.
We don’t rest much in our culture. As moms, it is even more difficult to find time for ourselves to rest. With load after load of laundry and dishes, with diaper after diaper and feeding after feeding, we run ragged caring for our children, husbands, home, perhaps our jobs… and we never rest.
Did you know the word “rest” appears 496 times in the Bible?! 496! That’s huge! And even huger is the fact that the first time the verb is used, God is the subject. Genesis 2:2 says, “By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work.” God rested. Think about that, the Master of the Universe rested. Not only that, in the Ten Commandments he commands us all to rest on the Sabbath day. And that day is to be considered holy. 
Maybe rest is important…
Tonight, I am going to listen to my body - more importantly follow God's example - and rest. I am going to sit down with a mug of skim milk, a plate of Oreos and my copy of Pride and Prejudice and begin my semi-annual reading of my favorite book. Then, I am going to get some much needed sleep.
Do you take time to rest? What are your favorite ways to give yourself some R&R?
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Leah, this is so good... I just try to push every thought of being tired out of my mind and never let myself stop until the end of the day, otherwise I would crash. This is making me think I should make more time to just rest. I mean if God even rested it must be ok to do, I think I always think of it as a sign of weakness if I can't get everything done and just need to rest.
ReplyDeletei am so glad you are doing VVV. I almost asked you the other day if you had ever gone to it. The class itself was a time of rest and rejuvination for me. I hope it continues to be that for you!
ReplyDeleteoh, and by the way, I STILL take a nap when Caed does. and sometimes I paint. Those are my ways of resting.
ReplyDeleteJess - My goodness we put a lot of pressure on ourselves, don't we? I often feel that the things that need to be done are more important than me OR that I will be judged on my performance and I don't care for myself. So rest up girl! We need it!
ReplyDeleteBeth - In the email Nancy sent out there was a quote from you, Ann Johnson, Erin Swanstrom, and Mikkin Helvig all saying why VVV is so great. With such great people loving it I figured I must too! Also, I am trying to nap again. Mostly I just lie there. :)