The Grossest Things

Top 10 Grossest Things I Have Experienced Since Jack was Born:

(Disclaimer: Talk of bodily functions abound! Not for those who can't handle words like boobs, nipples, poop, pee, etc.)

10. Seeing my nipple stretched out after Jack latched on the first time.

9. Being soaking wet for about a week when I was engorged because my boobs wouldn't stop!

8. Jack's diaper leaking and him peeing all over me while I was feeding him.

7. Jack spitting up on me - I can't wait until that ends.

6. Jack's diaper leaking and him pooping on my arm, stomach, anywhere - it has happened too many times and always with disposable diapers I might add.

5. Jack pooping on my hand while I was changing his diaper.

4. The return of my period. After over a year of its absence, I forgot just how nasty tampons, pads, etc. really are.

3. Jack spitting up in my hair at 1am and me only rinsing it off before going back to sleep, because who wants to shower at 1am?

2. Jack vomiting -not spitting up, vomiting -on me while I was breastfeeding him (in my bra, on my boob... pretty much all over). I think the only reason this is not number one is because I was more concerned about him than myself.

1. Jack spitting up down my shirt and feeling it trickle down between my boobs. (yes it is that gross, it happened again last night and... ew ew ew!!)

Jack is nearly 6 months old and I'm sure many things will gross me out more than these have. For example, he hasn't taken off his own diaper to play with his poop (a story my parents like to tell about me) or eaten rabbit poop (as Beth's baby did). By then I'll be begging him to spit down my shirt... no, no I won't. It's really gross.

Ew.

spit-n-shit

I'm tired of spit up. And I'm tired of poo.

For a while I accepted it. I learned to not change my clothes every time a little spit up missed the burp cloth. But have you smelled curdled milk? Have you worn it? Not pleasant.

I have been anticipating Jack spitting up in my hair and on Tuesday at 1:00am he did. Yuck. I didn't want to take a shower at one in the morning, so I rinsed it off, pulled it in a pony tail, tried not to think about it and went back to bed.

Last night, Jack had two blowouts (for those of you who don't know, a blowout is when the poo escapes the diaper, leaks through the clothes, and at times reaches the most obscure places of the body). Both times I got sticky grossness on my arm when I picked him up.

Sometimes I have to remind myself that Jack can’t help it. His poor little body isn’t mature enough to keep his food down or to consistently hold the poo in overnight. I'm just searching for a solution to the poop problem. Our cloth diapers contain the poo inside the diaper, but don’t absorb a night’s worth of urine. I think tonight we’ll put a disposable diaper on him and a cloth liner over the disposable. Maybe that’ll work. No more poopy clothes! What a glorious thought.

It’s not all bad. Maybe you’ll find this video as entertaining as we do.