After I went to the fabric store and couldn't find the right fake fur for the skunk idea I gave up and bought a costume. Yeah, I didn't try very hard... but even that was a lot of effort for me.
I've mentioned a few times my struggle with depression. Well, in the last few weeks it has gotten much worse. I haven't cared much about doing anything and the little energy I had went into daily life; however, even those few chores I have been able to do have taken the life out of me. I don't know how to describe it except when I would look at the dishes on the counter I felt pain in my gut. As though every chore was a personal insult that struck me at my core.
Last week, in the middle of the major snowstorm here in Denver, I went in to the doctor and am now on an anti-depressant. The hope I feel just knowing that it is going to get better soon is helping me through each day. Soon I'm going to be myself again! Wow. That is awesome.
I write all of this because many of you have told me your own struggles. I want you to know you are not alone. And I encourage you to seek help. There are some amazing therapists, friends, and doctors out there who can help you. They've helped me.
And maybe next year I'll have the energy to make Jack this costume:
Maybe...p.s. Now that I'm feeling a little better, I hope to start writing on a regular basis again. Thanks for reading!
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you are stupendous!
ReplyDeletep.s. that was me- lindsay blackstone!
ReplyDeleteI like the monkey better than the lion! Seriously!
ReplyDeleteLeeLee, I am sorry you are struggling with depression. I just want to encourage you, and tell you that it won't always be this way. When I get depressed, it is not typically bad enough where I need to go on meds, but someday it might be-- who knows! I am not opposed to taking them. maybe you already do this, but I also recommend:
Excersizing somehow(this can be somethign as simple as dancing around to a couple songs to make Jack laugh), praying a lot more (not that you already do this, but I feel very under attack by Satan during depression), tell Satan (outloud) to go away in the name of JC (It is empowering, and therefore, I believe it also increases endorphins), and, have at least one piece of chocolate each day... All of those endorphin boosters combined with kick Satan's butt tactics seem to work for me... as well as having someone to talk to about it, and just simply to say, "I'm depressed." and "Please pray for me."
I will pray for you... I hope you are feeling better in not too long-- those meds should help! Also, psychologically speaking, instead of looking for the light at the end of the tunnel, sometimes it helps to look up at the Light instead... ;)
Ok, and I just need to comment on the costume one more time... it's freaking awesome. He looks like the cutest monkey ever. No lie.
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